Work...work...work...a never-ending circle of starting and stopping!

Whether it be my job, my home, my projects, my reading, my weight-loss and excercise routine, whatever.....it seems like I'm never finished...and yet I'm always starting afresh, starting again, starting over, starting...starting...starting...and never feeling finished, finished, finished! Never feeling like I've accomplished something worthwhile; sometimes feeling failure...sometimes feeling despair...sometimes feeling ambivalence; always feeling tired!!! Hmmmm....something to think about; something to pray about; something to give over to God.

I have so many mixed feelings today...I feel "fat"; I feel "unfulfilled"; I feel like I'm running inside the wheel of the hamster cage, yet never shedding a pound; I feel like I need a change of scenery; I feel like I need someone to tell me I'm valuable! Hmmm....monopause, maybe? One thing I have done well...I've managed to stay with my "read the Bible in a year" schedule. Please, dear God...help me not to fail at this! Show me in your wonderful Word, how valued a daughter of the King I actually am! Show me that even in the mundane, you have a purpose. Show me that a smile can be healing, a breath of fresh air can be rejuvenating, and a day of rest can be the richest gift I can receive.

More later...

I'm "IT"....Rachel and Mike tagged me!!

Four Jobs I Have Had:
Sebastopol Apple Canner:
I peeled the bruised spots from the meat of each apple and tossed them in a water trough...(that's why I went to college)
Junior High and High School Spanish and Home Economics Teacher
Administrative Assistant at the University of Oregon Medical School
Management Level Positions for Verizon Information Services

Four Movies I Could Watch Over and Over Again:
An American President
The Sound of Music
Fiddler on the Roof
Shall We Dance?
Honorable Mention: One True Thing, with Glenn Close and Renee Zellweger (I wholeheartedly agree with Mike)

Four Books I Could Read Over and Over:
This is a hard one....so many books; so little time!

Four Places I Have Lived:
Santa Rosa, California
Portland, Oregon
Anchorage, Alaska
Dallas/Fort Worth, Texas


Four TV Shows I Watch:
Dancing with the Stars
Lost
24
Grey's Anatomy

Four Places I Have Been On Vacation:
Paris, France
Maui
Munich, Germany
Bermuda


Four Websites I visit Daily:
Blogspot.com (for all my family "scoop")
Verizon Online
Credit Union
Talbots



Four Favorite Foods:
Almost any seafood (but NOT sushi)with a glass of chardonnay
Light Ice Cream (especially Dreyers)
Fresh Fruit and cheese
Green mixed salads with all varieties of fresh lettuce, peppers, feta cheese, grape tomatoes....I'm hungry!

Four Places I'd Like To Be Now:
Listening to Sarah perform a solo violin piece
Listening to Skip Ryan's sermon at PCPC
Having tea at the Renaisance Antique House on Lovers Lane with Sarah, Rachel and Karen
Having my family around my dinner table...Mike and Rachel, Karen and Dave, Sarah and her guest, my husband.

Four people I'd like to "tag":
David (yes, Karen's David)
My sisters (all of them)
Deborah (my best friend)
John (my husband...he'd NEVER blog!)

The Angela Adventures

To the tune of "76 Trombones in the Big Parade"...

"Forty-six short days before the daughter weds...
A hundred-and-one details left to do..."

But the fun never ceases, and Karen has the planning under control! From cakes to flowers to DJ's to church decor, to bridal portraits, to showers given and showers to come...the girl is amazing!!! I've loved helping her with meetings and decisions, but she has truly done the work on her own. I'm so proud of her, and the event will be more than lovely! It will be filled with elegant beauty and Texas flavor...all rolled into one memorable, romantic, effervescent, long-remembered evening.

Me? I'm starting to get a little "weepy"...I'm struggling with the realization that I won't have my warm, morning chats with Karen any more. I struggle when I look in the mirror and realize I still have 8 lbs. to lose to fit into the dress I want to wear to her wedding. I sigh when I think of the "food events" that face me, and the self-control I seem to lack. BUT...I have a new motivator right now called..........CURVES! Yes, I've joined the group of middle-aged (meaning age 50 and higher) women who have committed to the resistance training of this amazing little workout regiment. I have a 30 day complimentary pass...after two visits I have screaming muscles and a new determination to shed some body fat.

I just finished reading a book that was really good...not anything that the "academic population" might want to indulge in, but truly a remarkable memoir of the legendary commedienne, Carol Burnett. I loved reading it; I loved following her zest for the theatre and for performance opportunities. I loved admiring her devotion to her Nanny who raised her under extreme poverty conditions. I loved tracing her fame through UCLA...where she worked so hard to earn her degree and pay for tuition simultaneously. While there was nothing spectacular about her spiritual life, there was something very magnetic about her drive, her focus, and her determination. And then there was the connection with her daughters...Oh, do I love daughterly connections...smile!! Carol Burnette - One More Time - A Memoir

I've kept up with "the Bible in a Year"...I posted a comment on my previous blog.

Love to all my readers/fans!!

Seven times Eight equals 56...

Yes...56 days until Karen Vendsel weds David Norvell. And I still have 8 lbs. to lose to fit into a never-worn, yet "perfect for the occasion" two-piece evening dress and jacket. Tonight's Supper Club with my dear fellowship group set me backwards two giant steps....alas....will I ever learn it gets more difficult the older I get. Exercise...exercise...exercise...I must build more time into my schedule for routine walking.

Tomorrow morning I will basque in the delight of being "mother of the bride-elect" at Karen's first wedding shower. I must admit I love watching, sharing, and living these exciting moments with my daughter. Yes...I'm living my life vicariously through Karen (and Sarah) right now...I guess it's because I feel like I missed out on so much when I was younger. It's so rewarding and wonderful to watch them thrive! I feel the same for my son and his wife...what exciting, adventurous times for them as they dive into their graduate studies, plan their futures as counselors and professors, and trust God for their ultimate happiness and their future abode.

I am journaling in 2006! I'm writing my prayers and my conversations with God...it is so refreshing, and I like going back and reading what I wrote days and weeks earlier. There are some prayers that have been answered and others that are in a pending state. I'm also reading the One-Year Bible...I pray that I'll keep current with it.

Alas...it is late, and I'm tired, and my computer battery is growing dim. More blogging later...

Nighty-night to my readers.

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree...how bare are now your branches!!

The pure delight I experieced five short weeks ago, has sobered to reality today! The memories of each treasured ornament I placed upon our tree have been packed away in Rubbermaid plastic storage containers along with those lovely little keepsakes for yet another year's hibernation. The glitter, the sparkle, the twinkle lights, the candles, the ribbons, the flickering flames from the tapers on the dining room table and the logs in the fireplace...have been replaced with the predictable ambience of our middle-class decor. I love the holidays, but as I grow a year older at each turn of the calendar year, I mourn the conclusion of this most special time of year...especially when I realize that my most precious gifts...Mike and Rachel, Sarah, Karen and Dave...may not be present at my tree in 2006. Each new turn in the journey of their adult lives will reveal new priorities, different commitments, and the beginning of their own Vendsel and Norvell traditions.

I loved Christmas 2005! My thoughtful husband, John, recognized that this might be the last year all the Vendsel Children and their significant others would grace our home for the holidays. Therefore, my gift was airline fare for those far away to be home in Texas for the holidays. We splurged on holiday festivities....food, flowers, restaurants, shopping, gifts, and little surprises along the way. My mother, "Grandma Nan", was an added "gift" to our home as well. We flew her to Texas from California, so she could enjoy her grandchildren's presence for a few days. Three generations present...how joyful! What a special blessing!

It was emotionally painful to see Mike and Rachel off at the airport! They left on the 26th for home in Philadelphia, where they were looking forward to a second holiday week of fun with Rachel's mother and father, Carol and John Allen. Karen and Dave left the same day to drive to Arkansas to visit the Norvell family. And Grandma Nan also left on the 26th...flying home to California to pick up her highly anticipated Christmas gift...Tillie and Trixie (two miniature poodles)!

Daughter Sarah is still home; not planning to drive back to Chattanooga until the 4th of January. She will have a student riding back with her; a blessing for this mom to know she won't endure the 12-hour drive alone! I'm enjoying her kindred spirit, our serious yet hilarious chats, our loving teasing, our walks around the neighborhood and to Parr Park. I'll miss her when she leaves, but I'm so proud of her accomplishments and her success in her first "real job" after graduate school.

New Year's Eve found John and me at the Convention Center in town, enjoying an evening of dinner, dancing, silent and live auction, "murder mystery" theatre, champagne toast and midnight breakfast! Whew!! The event was a fundraiser for the Runway Theatre, our community theatrical group. We've enjoyed our season tickets this year, and the productions have been very, very good.

Rachel taught me how to post pictures on my blog. I should have written the instructions down...I can't remember how to do it! As soon as I recall, I'll post some photos...

Happy New Year to all my readers...I'll post my thoughts, my goals, my ambitions for 2006 during my next post.

Love to all!